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I don't know if you remember any more than I did that I had this blog. It astonishes me that it has been almost two years and I have not written in this piece of space meant just for me and my thoughts. 

Is there a survey somewhere that shows the number of people that begin a task and don't see it all the way through? I bet that number would be pretty high! I took a chance at typing it into google and this was the first thing that came up: 

Yeah, I'm pretty sure I don't have ADHD. Also, did you see how they spelled "undiagnosed"? That's a side note of the editor in me talking. 

So what do I write in a blog where I have two years to catch up on. Write a list. Specifically, a list of what is going on in my life now, because that is what my mind can remember best. 

1. I'M ENGAGED (April 6, 2013)

It happened on the beach, early evening, and it was amazing. So class and simple, just as I had dreamt about it. 

2. I'M ABOUT TO GRADUATE

3. I'M LOOKING FOR A JOB

4. I'M PLANNING A WEDDING

Do you get the idea that I have a lot to do? You are correct! My days are spent making lots of to-do lists, planning a future, and learning. 

I had been feeling really overwhelmed for a while, but recently (thank God), I've learned to calm down and enjoy this transition in my life as a blessing and not a curse. I love to control situations, but the world is teaching me quickly that overly planning does not mean stability. 

This is the motto in my life right now: When you plan, God's laugh. God must be having so much fun with me.

This is my prayer for my life right now: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can't change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

You  know why I don't think I can keep a blog growing? There's no strategy. "Strategy" is a word that is used DAILY in my classes. 

If you want change, change your behavior. But before you change, you need to know what exactly you want. 

I don't know what I want yet out of the blog. Do I want to give people nutrition advice because that is my specialty that I don't get to use all the time? Do I want to just document my life? 

A blog needs a foundation, let's say a business plan. Whether or not a blog is used for a business, it could benefit from being built on top of a mission, vision, and goals. 

So, I"m going to start blogging again. But please excuse me as the posts will be random until I figure out my "strategy." 

oh… hey.

Before I begin, I know it's been long. I feel like I'm writing in my journal I promise myself to keep up with and end up starting each post like this "I wish I wrote in here more." I'm serious. Here it is for proof…

I know it's a bad quality photo but I did it on purpose because as much as I love you, I like to keep what I write in this journal private. But, back to what I was saying. It's been a while. To me, it hasn't felt like much because oh lord have I been through a lot.

I'm not a complainer, at least publicly. But I had to sit down one day and really pray to God for an answer as to why I've had the hardest semester of my life. Is it okay I say "semester;" I still say college terms. For those of you not in college - I've had the hardest four months of my life.

1. 2 surgeries: one was an emergency because of a complication and the other was planned and formed complications after. Funny how that worked out.
2. long distance relationship where I found out it will be another four months this coming spring semester. Need I say more?
3. first semester of graduate school studying something I've never studied before.
4. starting a new job at the same time as school.
5. insomnia. I still don't know why I have this. It just decided to join me during these months.

Honestly, there were times I didn't know what to do with myself. I just sat at my computer and wrote out what I felt and that seemed to work. Other than that, praying worked. It's amazing the little epiphanies that come into your head while your praying. This is what I started thinking after I put my hands together, looked up at the sky, and asked "why?"

1. I'm glad this happened when I'm not married and with children.
2. The nights I couldn't sleep I got so much work done.
3. Searching for ways to relax, I learned a lot of new hobbies I'm pretty good at.
4. I grew close to my family because this whole time I've been living at home, which is amazing.
5. It honestly could be so much worse.

So, there they are! 5 reasons my semester was horrible, but 5 reasons it was worth it.

Recently, instead of focusing on what has happened, I'm using it to catapult me into planning for 2012. I feel it'll be a good year people! Planning basically involves calendars, goal setting, and  reading. It is so much fun. Do I sound nerdy? Oh well.

One thing I'm doing is recording things I love right now that way I can read back at the end of next year and either make fun or appreciate those things.

Here are my top 10 things right now….

1. My new phone

2. real simple magazine

3. long dangly necklaces

4. the FSU seminoles. I'm thinking about my first credit card bit purchase being a boosters membership and 2 season tickets. Yea, this list is no joke.

5. little trinkets. preferably cute animals. this one is from vicenza, italy.

6. cupcakes. you knew this one would make the list.

7. these thin market pens.

8. positive quotes

9. cute fonts

10. him

spring

Spring semester planning is already under way. It's all about preparing to me and this is a low down on a typical week next semester.

This will be a very interesting semester.

priorities

This weekend I have to say I did nothing towards school and work. Well, I sent one email. At first I was upset because I wasn't getting anything done, but then I realized that sometimes rest is needed in order to come back to your bigger priorities with full force. The quote in my positivity book for today is above and it exemplifies how you need to think of the things you need to do in your day and prioritize.

For example, today I have a coupon for Michael's I want to use as well as continuing to write a diet plan for someone I told myself I'd finish by Thanksgiving. The deadline for the coupon is sooner, but the intricate diet I have to write takes priority. Michael's can wait if I don't have any time today.

We unconsciously make these decisions everyday so it's easy to get caught up in giving the wrong things a more important priority. If your child {and in my case sister} comes up to you and asks to play with you but you're busy writing an email, unless that email has to be sent in the next 10 minutes, stop for a second and play with that child.

Life flies by QUICKLY. How do you want to spend your day? Knowing you completed every errand or really paid attention to yourself and your family?

On another note, guess what recipe I looked up?

Cake pops are so wonderful. In a way, I'm sad that my theory of how they are made lived up to itself due to the fact now I know how "junky" they are. But I'm still eating them! For you health nuts, this is a great dessert for you. It may be packed with sugar, but the portion is so small if you only eat one. Great indulgence! Can't wait to make them.

pretend

This is what I love for the fall season…

1. The best part about these pair of boots is the emblem. So pretty and simplistic, yet makes a big statement because it's gold. 

2. I love this idea of taking really nice paper, typing up the menu you're serving at a party, and making it your napkin/silverware holder. This time of the year is full of get togethers and I am thankful for them. 

3. This dress, you might not be able to tell, is all lace. So delicate looking. 

4. I like the style of layering simple bracelets. I haven't pulled it off myself yet, but definitely plan on trying this season. If it doesn't look good I can just slip my sweater sleeve right over them. 

5. Pumpkin Spice Latte: I like two coffees in this wonderful world, this is one of them.

6. Recently I decided to stop biting my nails when I get nervous and as a reward, every two weeks I go to a nail salon to paint my new longer and stronger nails. This is the color I always go for. It looks so classy and when they chip you can't tell as much as if I had put on a darker color. 

Always be proud of what you love. If you don't love the new style of shoes one season, for example, how do you know the people who own them really love it themselves? Are they just wearing them because of popularity? I'd rather just focus on finding things I love and forming my unique style. Who knows, maybe one day all those people pretending to love things, will pretend to love my things. 

relax

Today is Saturday.

Time to relax and have fun with my family. For work, I sometimes have to do things on Saturday but this is the first weekend in a while I'm not traveling or working. It's weird to wake up and not know what I'm going to do. I was going to say it's weird not having a to-do list, but within two hours there will probably be one stuck on my laptop {whoever says to-do lists are only to write down work related things is totally wrong}. 

On my spare time, since now I have it I've been spending it watching some speeches on….

Link

It's a website comprised of different speeches ranging from the informative to persuasive. I personally like the "inspiring" tab since I love listening to speeches that motivate me. I sometimes think after I watch a speech that made a difference in my mind, where I'd be if I hadn't watched it. For example, if I watch Steve Jobs' famous motivational commencement speech, I am filled with joy and a yearning to live my life to the fullest. Then I think "wow, how would my day have gone if I would've just chosen to watch tv or sit around and not watch this speech?" This makes me want to take opportunities and go out of my way to show myself motivational things. 

In other news, I've decided what I'm giving to family friends for Christmas presents. Don't worry I won't reveal much because I like secrecy with presents. As for my own list, it's not that long: a new cell phone and a bike. Does that make me sound 16 or what!? 

Here is a hint of the present…

I'm excited to give this present and it definitely matches my personality. 

I love to think of everyone's presents super early because it is such a relief to know I have it all done while I watch frantic procrastinators rush through the store trying to see if their present ideas are still even available. I am no procrastinator! 

writing

When I'm not in a phase of laziness, writing takes up a lot of my time. 

I have a journal to record my innermost thoughts {I write mostly positive since I want my kids to read this one day}.

I write a post-it daily on what things I need to accomplish. 

I write thank you notes and just thinking of you notes and send them in the mail. Let me tell you something, people still appreciate getting letters in the mail. 

Catch the pattern of writing? It's such a beautiful thing and I believe in it so much because I didn't use to write in English. When I learned the new language I realized the importance of being able to communicate effectively and really appreciate words! I sound dorky. Whatever. 

My new two obsessions with words are quotes and making lists. So with further ado, here are my current lists to complete: 

I am so excited for Christmas I can't contain it. I'm starting my Christmas wish list as well as my "giving" list. No revealings yet of what will go on these. 

And as for quotes: 

I'm OBSESSED with this one right now. For me to stay positive, I need to constantly work on it. That means reading quotes, listening to upbeat music, and mentally coaching myself all day. I have my setbacks sometimes, and the littlest things can set me off, but little note cards like this help tremendously. This quote comes from a book my sister gave me last year for my birthday that has a new quote for every day. Tomorrow's lesson:

I have the power to transform the mediocre into the magnificent.